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Airdate: Thursday 7th September 2006
Time: 8PM
Channel: Living TV

Neptune High's closeted gay teens, including cheerleader Kylie, turn to Veronica for help when a blackmailer cracks into a private online bulletin board and threatens to publicly out everyone associated with the site unless they pay $5,000 apiece. Meanwhile, Keith continues to work on a case for Jackie's dad Terrence Cook, while looking into bus crash leads. Later, Logan romantically pursues sophomore Hannah, much to her father's distress.

 • Guest Stars

Corny (Jonathan Chesner)
Ryan (Bradford Anderson)
Terrence Cook (Jeffrey Sams)
Sheriff Lamb (Michael Muhney)
Hannah Griffith (Jessy Schram)
Tom Griffith (Rick Peters)
Kelly Kuzzio (Lucas Grabeel)
Leonard Lobo (Gil Birmingham)
Cindy "Mac" MacKenzie)
Kylie Marker (Kristin Cavallari)
Carmen Ruiz (Natalia Baron)
Madison Sinclair (Amanda Noret)

 • Quotes

Veronica: Dick, you totally nailed me.
Dick: Oh, man, so you're the fingernails chick from my New Year's party.

Veronica: You left some paint. Look.
Dick: That's only like the most valuable thing on your car.

Veronica: Why can't the evil just get jobs like the rest of us?

Corny: That's whose house I was headed to. I remember distinctly because I was like, "Damn, what if Amy answers the door in her unmentionables?" That would've been sweet.

Dick: First of all, I'm not letting her learn to surf on one of my boards. I'd sooner let her paddle out on my mother.

Kylie: Sorry to blow your mind, but I'm a lesbian, Veronica.
Veronica: Oh...well...that's cool.

Veronica: Where are you getting your intel? Jackie and I aren't exactly the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants. She's not what you'd call "huggable."
Keith: Whereas you warm right up to people? Hmm?

Dick: Dude, why are lesbians like so pissed-off all the time?

Veronica: And here, I thought we were getting to be pals.
Dick: Please. You date Logan, he's nailed for murder. You date Duncan, he's wanted for kidnapping. You get put on Robbie and Hunter's jury, they get sent to Chino. You're like rich-dude kryptonite, Veronica. This rich dude wants no part of it.

Veronica: Heard from our favorite videographer lately?
Carmen: He called over Christmas to try to apologize for that whole popsicle thing, like people even remember my scandal anymore. Pleasuring inanimate objects was so 2005.

Logan: My first girlfriend was murdered. My last girlfriend nearly got shotgunned by a PCHer drive-by. I mean, color me crazy, but I see a pattern. I'm trying to protect you.

Lobo: Terrence Cook owes me a significant amount of money. That's where my interest in him begins and ends. They can swing him from the rafters for all I care.
Keith: Well maybe all that swinging will drop some change from his pockets. It might be a little hard to get paid by an incarcerated man.

Veronica:: Jorge Zadia was a ringer. His name's on Carmen's list. So are you ready to be the bait, Corny?
Corny: Hell, yeah. No one's better. I'm what you'd call a "master bait."

Veronica: Did you just call me "Lady"?

Veronica: Damn you and your valid questions.

Jackie: I realize it's no bus filled with rowdy, towel-snapping jocks, but it'll smell better.
Veronica: I don't know. Um... do you have room for my giant foam finger?
Jackie: I do, and I can even drop you off around the block if you're worried being seen together.
Veronica: Yes. Please, by all means, protect my reputation.

Veronica: Ryan, we caught the mugger. He doesn't have the cranial resources to spell blackmail, let alone perform it.

Ryan: I told the victim they could come to you for help, but...I wouldn't hold your breath on this one.
Veronica: Great. I'll just head out into the hall and look out for the guy in the black hat twirling his moustache.

Veronica: Who's that?
Mac: Hannah something, I think. I'd be a willowy blonde too if my dad was a plastic surgeon.

Veronica: Our lives are so similar. The Mars family hangar is a spitting image of this one.

Jackie: So, what are you in the mood for? Hot-blooded Italian or cool and Teutonic?
Veronica: How about privileged and upper-crusty?

Lamb: I really hope this is the new Big & Rich.

Veronica: But tomorrow, we both gotta promise: say nothing to him. We cannot feed that ego. I like my Wallace humble.
Jackie: My dad told me that you're helping out with his case. That means a lot. Especially since he's already been convicted by half the people in Neptune.
Veronica: Well, luckily it's the half I don't like. So, it works out.

 • Trivia

Kristin Cavallari guest stars as the lesbian cheerleader. She is better known for her appearance in MTV's reality show Laguna Beach: The Real Orange County.

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